Chapter 1: What is health?Book: Health, Prenctice Hall Review the concepts found in your book:
web site on Setting goals, smart goals |
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- Stop using oppressive language: racism and sexism, all the -isms. This will help people decide that they like you more often, being oppressive is simply not peaceful and chill.
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Gratitude
Thinking of what you are thankful for immediately puts you in a good state of mind. Telling people that you are thankful for their existence immediately puts them in a good state of mind, it is easy, and it is free.
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- Maintain a positive attitude: when possible, you don't have to do this all the time, it's ok to feel what you feel, focus on peace and whether or not what you do will help resolve an issue
- Focus on your strengths: ask yourself what you did well today
- Form close relationships: to the best of our ability, set your bondaries and respect the boundaries of others
- Set goals for yourself: if you have a really big goal, think of smaller steps that can help you reach that goal (more on that later), see if there are people that you can collaborate with
- Avoid risky behaviors: we all take risks but are you eating pizza off the floor or taking a mystery pill? Is there a chance that a dog peed where the pizza fell?
- Ask for help: resources are there for you, you can also ask your friends to crowdfund to replace your stolen bike or ask for tutoring
- Help others: see what people need, tell them to let you know how you can support them
How self-esteem develops:
Activity: look at page 39
- Childhood: Children need support and encouragement from family and peers
- Adolescent: It is normal to be a bit self-conscious, hopefully we won't judge ourselves too harshly, you deserve love from yourself, media tries to set "beauty standards" to make everyone look somewhat similar by buying the same products, peculiarities rule
- Adulthood: adults struggle with the same things youth do, don't let them fool you, encourage them to have a healthy self-esteem along with you instead
Activity: look at page 39
- Make a list of your strengths and weaknesses
- Set ambitious but healthy goals for yourself
- Remember to not be too hard on yourself
- Rely on your values: what does that mean?
- Reflect on how you accept compliments
- Look beyond your own concerns
- Do not focus too much on appearance
maslow's hierarchy of needs
- Hierarchy of needs
- Physical needs: food, water, sleep
- Safety: shelter from elements such as heat, cold, and rain, to feel safe from violence at home or in their community
- Belonging: connection with other people, we need acceptance and love needed for emotional health
- Esteem: approval, recognition, respect, appreciation, and attention
Achieving your potential
- Self actualization:
- The ongoing journey of being happy with who we are and what we do on the planet.
- Personality traits of Self-Actualized People according to Maslow's studies:
- Realistic and accepting: sometimes we don't have all of these needs met so we focus on what we can do to be in a situation where the needs are met instead of being crushed by a reality that we are not completely happy with.
- Independent and self sufficient: bring your own supplies and take care of your own emotions, this makes it easier to be thankful for the support of others.
- Appreciative of life: recognize your opportunities and privileges and help foster a world where other people have them too. Recognize anything that is going well.
- Concerned about humankind: practice empathy, know that injustice is not necessary and support efforts to reach peace and equilibrium/ balance.
- Capable of loving others: realizing that other people are real and deserve love and respect as well as resources that will help them meet their needs.
- Fair, unprejudiced: reflect on how we have normalized oppression but don't need to continue to reinforce oppression, reflect on misogyny and misandry with an open mind.
- Creative and hard-working: We do not need to hold back from doing good work and showing that we care, we can always create something for someone.
- Not afraid to be different: When people are simply happy to be themselves.
Expressing anger in healthy ways
pg.42 in our book
- Accept your feelings: It is ok to feel anger, denying your anger will not make it go away, and ignoring your anger can lead to more destructive behaviors later on. Once you accept your anger you can work on expressing your anger in healthy ways.
- Identify your triggers: Know what makes you angry, it might be a particular person or situation, thinking about events in your past, or thinking about your future, you can write down what you feel in a journal. Know that your feelings are valid.
- Describe your response: Reflect on or write down what you did in response to your anger, and what happened after you responded. Reflect on whether or nor it helped relieve or process that anger.
Find constructive alternatives:
- Talk about it: After you feel better, try to discuss the problem. Let the person know how you feel without blaming them, listen, with respect to what the other person has to say. Even if talking does not fix the problem, you may feel ready to move on and see if they stop doing the thing that made you angry. If you told them how you feel and they still continue to hurt you there is a possibility that they are trying to hurt you and you can consider setting boundaries with the person. You can chose to talk to them less or only in certain places such as school or work. You have the right to do whatever helps you feel safe.
- Release excess energy: Physical activity to get the energy out, even a walk can be very helpful but punching things (soft inanimate things) works too, there is also dance and hiking.
- Avoid certain situations: Leave a situation when you start to feel angry or change your activities if there is no other way to avoid the trigger.
- Avoid destructive behaviors: think of healthy alternatives such as art and music
- Ask for help: get feedback from supportive friends and family, look up community resources.
- Social issue anger: Start a nonprofit organization or get involved in the solution, support organizations that are part of the solution
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Primary Emotions:
- Happiness
- Sadness
- Anger
- Fear
- Learned emotion
Love:
- We learn what love looks like through our culture
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Healthy Relationship Information:
Guilt and shame:
- When people in our life lead us to feel bad instead of being supportive we learn to feel guilt and shame instead of learning alternative actions, it can be helpful to feel these to some extent but if we linger in these emotions we could feel down and will be less likely to seek constructive solution
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Recognizing your emotions
- Sometimes anger can mask fear guilt and shame when we don't know how to express our frustration; we might appear to be angry.
- Ask yourself what led you to feel the imbalance of emotion and how to cope with the trigger to bypass having to label your feelings.
Coping with emotions:
- Coping strategies help you process what you feel in a healthy or constructive way.
- Examples include: talking to someone who won't judge you, taking a break by reading or going to an event, doing something nice to yourself to nurture yourself back to a state of equilibrium (be your own baby bird and baby bird caregiver), do something new to break out of the usual routine, art or music, connect to your hobbies and things that you love.
Common defense mechanisms
- Denial: refusing to recognize an emotion or problem, acting as though nothing is wrong
- Compensation: making up for weakness in one area by excelling in another area
- Rationalization: Making excuses for actions of feelings
- Reaction formation: behaving in a way opposite to the way you feel
- Projection: putting your own faults onto another person
- Regression: returning to immature behaviors to express emotion
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Coping
- Confront the situation
- Release excess energy
- Take a break
- Talk through feelings
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Sometimes the way you feel is a response to abuse
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