identify ways you already support your friendsSupport can be a phone call, a hug, a visit, a ride to school, help with a project, advice, a sympathetic ear
Offer support that empowers
Be an active listener
Ask your friends for support
Encourage friends to ask you for support
Define the boundaries of friendship that work for youIt is common for friends that are not truly friends to try to blur the lines in your relationship and try to get "benefits", this is coercion a red flag of abuse. cycle of violence, it can start with small stuffThe cycle of attempting to obtain and maintain control over another person can be seen in different types of relationships. It can be part of an unhealthy work dynamic, friendship, or romantic partnership. Violent Episode
Calm stage
Tension-Building
An abuser might lead you to think that you are friends and then lead you you think that they want a relationship so you will do things that are outside of the boundaries of a friendship. They might manipulate you into having sex, thinking that they care about you, and want a long term relationship. They then deny ever suggesting that you were anything other than friends. They might pretend that the sex never happened, but expect you to still be ok with being friends, just as you were before the incident, this is a form of rape. This can lead a person to feel uncomfortable in the environment they usually hang out it in and can lead to a sense of isolation and silencing. This behavior is normalized in some social settings, it is ok to speak up and let others know how you feel about the situation, they might ignore you, but you gave them a chance to listen to a different perspective. Hopefully they have learned ways to be supportive. We cannot change abusers, we can only stay away from them, and set boundaries if we need to be near them, it is not our job to monitor the boundaries, we can only do our best and hope for the best. People do abusive things for a sense of power and control, sometimes power and control are maintained via privilege dynamics.
We have peace when power is shared.
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |
Details
AuthorWrite something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview. Archives
January 2021
Categories |